The Thinking eyes ...

The Thinking eyes is something i thought a long time back ... but I thought I share this with you all this morning .. haa I know The lot of anime I watch are taking their toll .. but this is the best way to express ones turmoil ... this is how you can vent all that in your mind .. "sketches are something that do not need any words to vent your emotions .. they speak for themselves" .. I hope I am able to speak !! It is difficult to draw .... pencils .. I am trying to improve and the sketches will improve ...Any tips and appreciation are welcome ..Look at the eyes what are they telling you !! even I am not able to comprehend them .. If you are capable then ... !!!

The Evil Laugh ..

Wanted to post something when the month is almost going to end .. and I cannot post anything without a drawing so did a sketch .. to accompany it .. This is a tad dark !! but dark ones are the ones which have greater meaning and deep thoughts are seen through them .. you can see what .. Venom , a doll's face ... so many other things .. it is up to you to think what it may say !! I know I am not updating the same way I promised .. but keeping up with pencil sketches is difficult and time consuming .. but still it is one of my passions and I cannot leave painting !! the sketches I promise will get darker , thoughtful and better in the future !! then that is what I am here for :) ...

The Secret ...Curiousity ..and a Message ...

Once when I was a child I was told that .. if I touch this then I will get a shock .. but if I was never told then what !! Some years back during my undergrad years , I has a nice experience , it was a small one but yet gave me a real good thought .. I was at Maruti's home just spending time , useless gossip as usual .. In his house there was a instrument called as as the racket shocker , that was used to kill Mosquitoes by swinging at them !! There are so many things that you want to know but you are said not to do it since that will cause some kind of freak .. if not then you would have done it and learnt it anyway whether it being good or bad for you !! ..... will continue this .....

A New Lesson Taught ..

Life is Fleeting .. as I began my first post .. I thought the same way .. It is very difficult to come across people who actually teach you something .. I do not say that in the may of learning .. Learning and teaching are two different things.. you can learn a lot of things by searching the internet and there is so much "GooGle" in our life .. but the thing is there are basic fundamental in life that only proper experiences can teach you !! I learned it from a very special person at the University of Florida .. It is not everyday that some statement actually influences you to do something .. and you go for it .. This was just one of those moments where I went for it ... The person told me " Always be prepared to question others .. the best they can deter you is to say you "NO" .." that is a very important lesson .. it gave me confidence and I did something that I was always shy of ... not scared .. " I am not scared of most of the things. especially normal people" but the barrier of shyness was always there since I was always a introvert .. I am still more of a solitude loving person .. but these incidents give me a lot of confidence .. When somebody tells you something inspiring and when you go and do it .. and it works for you .. then it is so much nice .. the whole world seems to be smiling with you and you are happy with everything .. you fill with so much respect for the person who tells you to do things since in this case the person is a complete stranger to me !!! I have also met people in my life where people have guided me in the wrong direction .. There are people who are so close to you .. but still they guide you in a direction which will be a complete loss to you ... just so that they can see you lose something and fall behind .. these people are " outright Sadist" and I hate such people .. I hate people who do things like that .. I will not boast .. but I love mankind ... and I love people who think good of others even though they do not know each other and are complete strangers ... When I was in Bhubaneswar .. I had a secret wish that god give me that much capability so that I can help somebody everyday and I can make somebody happy ... The somebody being a "Complete stranger" .. I have also done things relating to such incidents .... I am writing this blog for myself and I want to remember things .. The time when I helped the Old man .. The time when I fed the people with the money I got , the time when I always use to carry my friends to the hostel on my bike and the time when I was so hurt with Khalique and Jagan when they did something that was so unkilely ...It is a time to remember .. The tapovan near Khandagiri .. Just parking my bike and letting the scented breeze touch my face . that was India .. There are lot of trees in gainesville but the scent , the aroma is not there ... Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. you can find a deep tinge of Burnt Beef here !! during football season .. I wont say the place is bad ... but the place I miss was better ... India is crowded no doubt but mark my words when I say this .. whenever you want solitude you can get it ... Even at ISCKON I found solitude when I just sat in front of Lord Krishna and prayed ... It was a wonderful feeling .. It was also a feeling of solitude when I travelled to my Aai's place in the Bus .. sitting near the window as the bus was passing through the cuttack-BBsr Highway ... Even though the bus was filled with 200 people then also you will feel peace ... because all that was part of my life ... Khandagiri , Indradhanu market, firestation , Jaydev Vihar , Acharjya Vihar , Vanivihar .... All this was part of my Life ....... HAAA I always stray away ... but that is what is about wrting a blog .. it is impromptu !! Things you fill when you are thinking about something .. that is what is for me blog writing .. Poeple tell me that I should jot down things on pen and paper and then write in a systematic way.. BullShit !!! I say .. A blog is a place where you jot down your thoughts .. your experience .. I am writing so that I can come back some day and relive the things that have been the past ..... The Picture above shows the view of Khandagiri from Top ... Ya as I was saying if strangers could just be as good !!!!!! I will never forget MF ... Thank you !!

Evil Has his Forms ..

Think of the evil and ..... This is one of the forms that I get when I think of my nightmares !!! Well Just to show that I draw them and not copy and paste from somewhere !!! I will always come up with more new faces ... Faces have so much to tell !!! What does this tell you !!!

Another one .. I will get more on the darker side ..

My way

My Caricatures and my Time pass ... I try to draw again ... I know pencil drawing can be time consuming but one always has to stick to the ethics and his discipline .. I like it so I will do it .. I will somehow find time ... Now that I am constantly adding things I feel good about it that I am not getting bored at it ...

My Conscience .. Part 1

As I go through Mahabharata again , I ponder what all that Mahabharata has taught us .. through the ages . It does not matter whether Mahabharata was something that happened in reality or it was just a myth ..but what actually matters is that it has taught us so many truths and lessons of life that nobody is following .. even by Making a foolish and sort of a Parody of the original Mahabharata .. "EK" is breaking the rules laid out .. I was really hurt when people took the Vishnu shrotam and turn it into some type of mindless song for a B grade movie that is a "wannabe" for a good bollywood movie .. while at the same time spending more that 100 crores on something that cease to mean anything .. Ohh you could do so much with those 100 crores or more .. you could make a school or a hospital for people or children .. which will make you so much more of a "hit".. Ahhh .. when will this !!!! I am turning into a idealist !! people will say that "ahh .. he speaks shit!!" .. once he is a millionaire(if I can..I cant!!) he will never even look back at his Blog !! But how can somebody be a millionaire and a Philanthropist at the same time .. You cannot be that !!

Mangalam Bhagavan Vishnum Mangalam Garudadhwajah Mangalam Pundareekaksham Mangalayatano Harih

All auspiciousness to God Vishnu All auspiciousness to One who has Garuda as His flag All auspiciousness to One who has eyes like the lotus flowers And auspeciousness to Hari

May god give innocence and truth fullness to the minds of people so that they can try to be true to their conscience ..

To be or not to be ....THE BELIEVER

Faith is the confident belief or trust in the truth of or trustworthiness of a person, idea, or thing. Rain is Pouring heavily the sky is all dark .. There is a cool feeling in the atmosphere as I listen to the sweet tune of a Sax... "Smooth jazz" .. There is not much to do as the plans of re-opening of "Gator Nights ", seems bleak as the pour is sweeping all the plans into the drain .. There is thunder but this thunder is not strong enough ..... As I sit here in the corner of my room , A thought enters my mind .. Who is a Believer ?? Am I a believer , Is the person staying in my neighbourhood a believer .. Is Jack a Believer .. Is the guy handing down small pamphlets with cartoons of Bible a believer .. Is the Temple Priest the guy or is it the guy holding the cross in the church .. How about the mother who feeds her child or the father who does not find work today to feed his family a believer .. Is the citizen of Zimbabwe a believer or the guy who looks for some news of his missing brother on a plane crash a believer . Is a gambler a believer or the producer and the actor who have a movie worth 100 crore at stake are believers . Is Barrack Obama a believer or was Bush a Believer .. who among these !! If all these guys are believers then there is nothing to worry .. there are people believing and they have faith and the whole world is following, but if they do not then where is the faith and who do you look at to find the lost faith . There are so many truths in life , that are known and some are not known to us ...The problem is man does not the want or care about the truths that are already known .. he wants to know about the things he has not faced yet .. In this post I would like to tell about a real life experience that just came along some days ago .. Being in America has its own way or take on Religion .. Here they wont come out in the open and launch "civil wars" , curfews and Dangas to make their point ..They will not start a riot and kill people and harm Nation's property to make their point since they know that if they do so , They will be brought to justice in no time and this is not allowed by their government , I respect this fact .. but sometime else on these thoughts .. Here they get their way by things called Baptism, converting and making you come their way .... This is there way to make you be on their way or is it ?? The guy came to me and handed me a copy of something which had a label " where are you .. you are away from God and god wants you to be with him" .. He asked me if I am a christian .. I said that no I am not .. I am a Hindu but it does not matter . He asked me what I know about Christ .. I told him that he was born in Jerusalem and lot of other things .. He asked me a weird questions that I was not much prepared for .. he asked me, Do you know he died because of our sins .. I said how can he die because of my sins when I was not even born when He died . He said that is the fact since our sins are not just of this life .. I said I do not believe in things like this since I do not know about the death of Jesus or nor do I have proof in his birth .. I believe in things that I see .. He asked me do you see electricity , I said no I don't but I do see things happening due to electricity .. I said it is a form of energy only that is got from earth itself .. he said "ya and god is making all these things happen and also he is the one who has given the earth all this energy". I said how can you say that Jesus is the only God .. Have you seen Jesus .. He said "ya this is where faith comes in" I said "I have not seen electricity but you know What, things such as you charging batteries , your appliances and your house is running on that only .. but where does Jesus come into all that .. He is not making all this happen ..since I have not heard about Jesus in any of the Journals that I read" .. He said "you do not have faith then " .. I said "I have Faith in the universal being who has the answers to all the questions that are left unanswered but yes I do not have faith on "Jesus" .. I do not have faith on something which you will force me to have faith on .. A person will never have faith on something you ask him to do without telling him why he is going to do all that.. he will never be a believer when you force something on him .. If you are making him a follower by fear of damnation and all that "holy crap ", then there is not a bigger sinner than you .. This is my take on being "The Believer" .. I want people to come up with their takes .. Believing by the way does not mean that you have faith on god ..There are different kinds of faith .. you can have faith on an ideology , you can have faith on a particular way of living life , you can be a person who is against a certain belief .. these are the different ways you could have faith ..The children have different ways to keep their faith alive . When I was a kid , I believed in reading stories . I use to read and enjoy my comics and Fairy tails by Enid blyton and mysteries by Agatha Christie .. Ya there were children in my times , who use to enjoy reading Tinkle , Asterix,Tintin and Hardy Boys ... Ahhhh Those were the times .... but why did we enjoy something because somehow our subconscious made us think that these things were happening somewhere and pixies , goblins and elves did exist and someday somewhere in some part of old England or Ireland .. we will meet them .. and this is what made us read the fairy stories .. we idolised some heroes and believed in them .. we had faith in our characters and thus we followed them .. As the innocence of childhood faded the faith also began to change .. you give a 30 year old guy , loving and understanding a Enid Blyton to read .. he will smack your face and call you insane .. It is just that his faith has changed .. His beliefs are different now .. He is more practical and thinks that the way he thinks and the things He believes in are more real now and are related to him ... But what is real ??? what is the Definition of reality ?? The newborn does not know what is real .. we are the people telling him a particular thing is real and the other thing as it to us is fantasy . We are the ones who tell him to believe something and we are ones who tell him what is not there and has to discarded .. But who has given us or our Fore-fathers or their forefathers .. to brainwash minds ... Can you imagine the generations of make believes that have been done till now may be thousands and thousands of years .. we are made to have faith on something that we hear about , that we listen about and that we read about only .. We are not having any thought of our own .. so where do we get our faith from .. whom do we go to know what is the actual truth ... A guy asked me once " Why is a electron called a electron , and why a proton called a proton " Somebody named it so and "what is a positive charge " My answer to that was .. it is positive to something negative .. but the question is wrong itself .. what do you mean by positive itself .. Is it something that attracts , is it something which is same as you in characteristics , behaviour ...what is it then ??? Okk Coming back to faith .. Different ways people believe things .. Its just that people are interested and are drawn towards things which they have faith in .. Like lets say you choose a profession .. It is always and always true that a person almost always tries to choose a profession which is most easy to get and always gives him the highest pay . There are some idealistic people who choose a profession to Help the earth and save the Mankind .. but the thing is that finally you are choosing a profession because it is making you happy .. because you have faith that someday this profession will make you fulfill your main goal that is to make you happy and satisfied .. this is how you find faith in the profession you choose ... I will continue this .. please comment !!!

SO.. I am Drawing again .. so why not add the ones I just did .. I am rusty .. I know .. it was difficult to draw even this much .. but I will surely get better .. if I keep drawing .. I cannot do oils .. since it is too costly here , but I will surely do more of pencil ..Lets hope I improve fast ..

Some of the Oldest memories re-lived .. I cannot believe Raj-comics still are running and flourishing in India .. I am very proud of it .. see I was a guy always having a will to indulge in doing a lot of things .. I was not into too much sports .. but I did play .. I gym regularly even today .. but Raj-comics was the cause I had interest in reading, I loved them as a kid .. come on U cannot blame me .. I was 7 or 8 when I started loving these comics .. okk so I did started reading "Enid-Blyton" ..A predecessor of J k Rowling .. and mind me when I say that .. she was no-way anything less than Jk Rowling .. but my first love ..and I can still read Raj-comics .. I came along this blog : this is really wonderful that I would like to share to any comic lovers and I would also like to share with all you comic lovers the main Website of Raj-comics .. Its infact pretty-cool : http://www.rajcomics.com http://hindicomics.blogspot.com/2009/07/home.html

Ok you guys must have read the last part if not do that first .. It will give you an Idea from the start . The Epic India map shows the parts of India that was .. The thing is that the first question that I want you guys to answer is :

1. why do we believe in the fact that this is the original Indian Map .. The Indian map here shows the part of the Mahabharata such as Hastinapur, Panchal,Magadh,Sindhu Matsya and Indraprast .. Do we find any of these in the Indian Political or the physical map now , if not where are these now and why are these places which were so very much historical taken away from us .

As we proceed further into the lives of the characters in the Mahabharata , we see the first character that is Introduced of importance and who is also considered to be one of the main reasons for the Mahabharata war , is Santanu .. He is a descendant of the Bharata race, of the lunar dynasty and the ancestor of the Pandavas and the Kauravas.He was the youngest son of King Pratipa of Hastinapur and he became the king of hastinapur once his elder brothers were not there to do so . The problem with Santanu was he married "Devi Ganga" and that was also because of a curse that was on him from his previous life ..It was considered that Santanu was a god himself and he was given the curse by lord Brahma that he will be born on Earth as a Mortal bieng .. His love for Ganga was the reason for this curse .. The second question arises here :

1. The question is that Santanu married Ganga and Ganga took a oath from him that he would not ask him what she is going to do .. Santanu bieng all tranced by the beauty of Ganga married her ,, but when he saw her drowning all the sons of his one by one in the river Ganga , he could not take it any-more and in the last chance he asked Ganga and broke his promise .. The question is Like Shantanu when given the promise , why did he break it ?? Did not he know that if he breaks the promise then it will result in Ganga been gone forever.. This happened and so Shantanu was left all alone without a wife .. when finally he was not alone anymore when Ganga came to her and gave him back his son "Devbrat" .. Devbrat was a very good prince and also suited for the throne .. and Santanu should have left it at that and should have taken tapovan by giving the throne to Devbrat , but he is did not do so .. he was old but could not give away to his carnal pleasures and was struck again by the beauty of a fisherwoman , Satyavati .. This is the reason which led to "Bhishma"
2. My 2nd question is .. why did this happen and how was right and who was worng in this doing ??

The Mahabharata ... It is the largest Hindu epic and it is said to be one that is beyond any body's knowledge and it is said that a lifetime will be less when one tries to understand the Mahabharata .. After I halted at Florida .. I found a new found passion of knowing and understanding the stories and the reasons behind why this epic was so popular among Indians and also globally ... As I watched the Mahabharata again and again I tried to understand that as it was shown not everything that was said in the Mahabharata was right and not everything that was said to be wrong was wrong !! .. The main characters were the Pandavas and the Kauravas .. There were so many other subsidiary characters who were also important as the story progresses.. There are so many characters and so many stories behind each character and the mysteries that need to be answered .. I will be slowly getting into these details bit by bit .. Everybody knows the story of The Mahabharata but very few actually think about certain points and faults that are seen in the Mahabharata .. I will basically look into these faults and I will try to pick out what the solutions are and I will need comments on why people think these are correct or are wrong ... for the start I would like everybody to see how was India portrayed at that time .. you could click on the figure and zoom to see the areas that are considered important for this story.

Hey .. So .. who gets to decide which Profession is best .. I dislike most of the celebs .. mostly the ones who are not humble and think they are above the "common man".I do not know I feel a repulsion against them .. I feel like, lets take the example of the "Hindi film Industry" no merit whatsoever .. there are loads of star-kids who fall from the sky with a golden spoon in their mouth and the thing that hurts is that they are given so many chances so survive .. like HR, ABj.. I do not want to name .. them while at the same time .. how many chances we engineers and doctors get to succeed in our life .. May be twice , thrice and that too we are not completing with our own bad performance .. we are relying on the rest 2 lakh students who give the entrance to be somehow perform relatively less and be behind us .. It does not matter to me .. which profession is best .., An Engineer , A Doctor (I personally respect a true "Doctor" more than the people of my own profession".. Who is a true Doctor again ?? who decides that .. May be the Ethics committee .. If at all we have that in India ??) , An Architect , An Artist , A scientist , A lawyer ... there are so many professions .. and I feel that the profession got not by ancestry but by merit is the best .. see again I am not the one to decide .. This is just my opinion .. Like some months back , I had a argument with my friends , that people cry after watching the movie "RDB" and "Taare ZP" but do you really need to cry or is our tears worth it .. lets see .. There are so many calamities striking the earth now .. when a entire species of White elephants disappeared from the earth you did not cry , when thousands of people died in the floods of Orissa , you watched it in the TV news and changed the channel you did not cry , when thousands of people died in the Bhuj Earthquake .. you just watched the news ,, you again did not cry ..... and tell me How many people cried when the US attacked IRAQ and thereof been thousands of death and still counting , people are Homeless and unfed in most of the parts of under developed Africa .. Most of the ignorants in India Don't even know the meaning of a " civil war" half of the knowledgeable also do not care about it ..so why cry on something that is actually false and baseless .. and is actually done to finally hit the so called "Box office" on a general Friday and is there for the sole purpose of been declared as a "hit" and then take you money .. and the producers being happy ... this is what I try to explain them .. but they do not understand About Politics .. I am not biased ... See I don't call my politicians biased and corrupt .. that is because I have no right to do that .. I have not voted as yet ,, and they have responsibility that I do not understand completely yet ,, since that is not my field .. I believe you should be the source of the change that you want to see unto others .. otherwise just commenting on state of the things is not ethical !!! I sometime think .. Sports is a better profession since it involves a lot of physical strength , stamina and discipline ...but then the competition and the success gets to you and you start to aspire more and believe in drugs and enhancements .. there are the dark side of each and every-profession ... There is again coming back to the same questions ... that haunts .. which is the best profession ?? Foe me I believe the profession which takes care and is a way of benefit to the whole earth .. which has given so much to us .. is the best profession .. to us .. I want comments on this .... if you people will comment then I can get a better answer ...Tell me what is right and wrong !!!

Ohh welll.... Fed won .. did not everybody wanted it ... so he won .. but I did not want it .. roddick worked so hard till the end .. He should have won it .. but the better man won .. Ahh I dont think roddick will come as close ever again ... hard luck ...

Today's layout : Well today I will be again working and helping the cause of research again .. I will tell you more on this ... More on Connecting a WAN .. , Working on "Netbeans" , Learning "Time Series Analysis" , MATLAB .... HEY .. like untill my website is ready .. which I am too lazy to complete .. I think I can also make my blog a little bit educational for people who might want to learn and Interested on what I am working on .... Yes .. I will make my blog educational ... but lets see .. if I get time on that .. I am no guy interested in Literature .. I try not to write wrong english .. but I will put what I am here for .. I will put engineering and research ,.. here .. for the time being .. I will show my room .. since It is almost time to leave the place where I live .. Tag1 : Pics above shows the view from my study table .. that I will always miss ..

At the left .. The new ones are Rohini and Jasmine and Ravi .. eating ... From Left to right : Me,varun, Akshay, Avinabh ,Amit,mudit,rahul, Aditi. From right to Left : Amrita,Chhavi,yash, Arihant... OK... The Pot-Luck ... This was good and filling .. We will have it again .. since the food did not get over ..

SO ... Happy Independence day ..... to Americans .. There were Celebrations and we also celebrated it in a "Indian" form ... The way we had ours ... seems much better and sumptuous ...

This is the Oxford .. Just Liked the view of it .. magnificent example of British ancient architecture .. Thought to share it with others ...

I think .. so I am .. but why do you need to think any more !!

I was just wandering through "you Tube" when I came across a particular video that I liked a lot . I will give you the link . http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gLBE5QAYXp8 .. It is basically stating how things actually worked . A thought came to me , like why do we need to do all this , when the end result of all the research we Phd and masters candidates , and all the Managerial MBA's are doing is to increase and pamper the human needs . The video shows specifically that as we are doing more and more research , coming up with newer products and disposing older products we are basically consuming up the whole of the earth and we are eating up the existing species .. I am doing research on computer architecture and chip design , somebody else is working on to build a new processor that will be faster and lighter and somebody else is trying to find another material that could replace silicon ... but why !!! why are we doing this just so that some kid can boast to his friend at school , that the new Playstation has lauched which has inbuilt virtual reality and which runs multiple online games at a time and the games have better graphics and the there is no lag while streaming .. and then the consumers are happy for some half a month and at the same time the people who have done this want to make/create another competitive market and thus they launch another Gaming processor which will be a better one .. and there are the market gurus who are always there to sell and market these products and the consumer is the one who is there to buy them on and on and on .... when will this end .. no this is not the question .. I am asking myself a question .. when will people stop thier research so that we do not come up with new things , when will people stop apllying there research on the cost of the environment .. when will the number of people coming out of Management colleges dwindle ... the number of animals who are present in wild reserves are dwindling , the species of wild animals are slowly becoming extint ... but the people doing research are not dwindling .... there are more and more research happening . people dont want to be satisfied with what they have .. they will need a better i-pod and they want to have all the features built into it .. the society has become such that you cannot back out now ..This is the problem .. you are working so hard ....do you need to work so hard .. Everyday you wake up .. take hold of your Laptop and start coding ....and at the end of the day you pray to god and say... ya I am at the right path since I am working so hard and I will succeed one day ... on doing what ??? Destroying the only planet that god has made for you .. and you are working so hard to destroy it .. The end result is that only ... ........ To be continued ...